Arthur Quits Drinking
by Tsukiyo-kun
Summary: What will happen when Arthur finally decides to stop drinking? The outcome is bound to be hilarious. I added some fanservice too!


_Hello! NeeNee-chan here! Alright! I know it has been a while since I have posted __**anything**__ here and I am feeling guilty about that. I decided to do something a little different from what I normally do and write a one-shot. Arthur here is the lucky winner! I just had to write something about Hetalia Axis Powers! Depending on how motivated I get tonight, I just might throw in SexyWaiter!England! The current time is 11:32 pm EST, July 17, 2010._

_Writing Prompt: We dare you to have a character's meal talk to him or her in your next scene._

"Well as much as I hate to admit it, that stupid git Alfred and that damn _frog _were right! Quitting drinking is one of the best decisions in my life!" Arthur gloated to himself at the dinner table. He began to cut up his food into smaller pieces and continued talking to himself.

"Now my imaginary friends can't get me! Here in the sober world, I am safe! I mean, they weren't all that bad. It was until they started trying to kill me is when it got out of hand!" He contemplated out loud. Arthur did not care that he was talking to himself. This was probably one of the first times that Arthur had the opportunity to speak only to himself alone. He was accustomed to the other imaginary creatures taking part in his discussions. This was a new experience.

"This truly was the smart choice here." Arthur agreed with himself. He glanced down to realize that he had been talking the entire time and had not touched his food once. Arthur stopped talking for once and ate his food in silence. He wondered what would happen now that he was truly rid of his imaginary friends.

Arthur finished eating his meat and moved on to his vegetables, which happened to be a mound of peas. He scooped up some peas with his spoon and lifted it towards his mouth. In the process, one pea fell off of the spoon and onto the table. Arthur reached his hand over to pick up the fallen pea.

"Ow." The pea rolled over.

"D-Did that pea just talk?" Arthur froze. He could swear that the pea just talked. Arthur took a closer examination at the pea. It had a face on it! Arthur could have sworn up and down that the pea looked just like Alfred's current leader, Obama.

"Your soul is mine, Limey!" The Obama pea chanted.

"Oh Shi-!" Arthur spazzed out and screamed like a little girl. He grabbed his cup faster than possible and trapped the pea inside.

"I was wrong. They always find me…"

After Arthur finished eating his meal in total shock over the Obama pea and suspicion that the rest of his food was out to get him, he got up to wash his plate. Arthur had something that he needed to take care of first before he could wash dishes. He raised the cup and tilted it at an angle while he slid the newspaper under. Arthur took the cup, which held the Obama pea, to the sink and threw it into the drain. He flicked the switch for the garbage disposal and smiled. Arthur heard the screams being made by the offensive pea over the gurgling and whirling noises made by the garbage disposal blades but did nothing to help. Once he was certain that the Obama pea was dead and completely shredded, only then did he turn off the garbage disposal.

"Well, that takes care of that." Arthur wiped his hands together. He started to whistle and headed back to the table to take care of the dishes. On his way back to the sink, Arthur stops and sees movement by his window. He sets the dishes on the counter and goes over to the window to see who was there. Arthur looked out of the window and saw nothing. He opened up the window and looked down.

"I'll fucking kill you, fucking Limey!" It screamed at him.

"Tony… really does exist?"

"Fucking Limey!" Tony spat at the British man.

Arthur proceeded to slam his window shut and locked it. He ran towards a cabinet and flung it open.

"Screw this! I would rather be drunk than to deal with this!"

The next thing that occurred was that Arthur began to chug a bottle of rum and strip his clothes.

"Hey ladies. Coffee, tea, or better yet, me?" Arthur said seductively.

**Author's notes:**

_Oh no! Beware of the Obama pea Arthur! I just had to throw Tony into the mix! XP_

_ I got the Obama pea idea from DeviantArt. Please review!_


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